Parenting is quite the journey. It pushes us to such extremes and limits we didn’t even know existed. It can exhaust us, crush us and bring us to our knees. But it also can inspire us and lift us to heights only dreamt about. If we let it, parenting can be an opportunity. An opportunity to challenge ourselves, our beliefs, our values and our way of living. To see the world through a childs eyes is such a gift. The love we have for our children can be such a motivation to make this world a better place. It puts so much into perspective.
We want the best for children and for their future. We want them to grow to be functioning, healthy, compassionate, successful and happy people. But how do we achieve this massive feat we set up for ourselves? We refuse to accept failure as it is our children at stake. Pressures mount and expections are high. We continually second guess ourselves and analyse our children to see how well we are doing thus far. We scour through parenting books. We talk to other parents and join support groups in search of some insight. In times of weakness and exhaustion we fall back on our preprogrammed ways of regurgitating our parents famous words. We come up with rules and guidelines. We want to protect them and keep them safe. But how do we let them soar?
The biggest and greatest lesson I have learned (and am continually relearning) in parenting is to live my life the way I want my children to live their life. I am their guide, their mentor, their model. I want them to be respectful to others, so must I. I want them to be generous and kind to strangers, so must I. I want them to care about the environment and our community, so must I. I want them to love learning, so must I. I want them to be active and eat healthy, so must I. I want my children to be able to follow their dreams and live their passion, well so must I. We can let our children be our motivation to make the time to recreate ourselves to reflect the person we truly want to be. We get to ‘walk the walk’.
By giving ourselves permission to live our lives to the fullest and follow our heart, we in turn give permission for our children to do so. Whatever standards, rules or guidelines we give to our children we must first follow them ourselves. We can head out to our community and volunteer. We can start study groups and book clubs. We can help those in need. We can smile at strangers. We can stand up for what we believe in. We can make time for our hobbies. We can be their for our friends. We can love and respect our spouse. We can forgive and honour ourselves.
Now of course all this is much easier said then done! Maintaining the balance between responsiblities, family and ourselves is a tough juggling act. One that may never be fully and completely achieved. But with time, patience and practice it all becomes more natural. And hey by making our own mistakes and admitting them and learning from them, we in turn let our children make their own mistakes.
So here is to my guys, Thank you. Thank you for pushing me to my limits and beyond. Thank you for bringing me to my knees.
