Ready to throw in the breastfeeding towl - need advice :(

[Shae]

I have been breastfeeding for 4 weeks now. Im not sure if what we go through day to day is normal or if there is something wrong so here I am asking for advice from the pro's!

I think Im either eating wrong foods or my milk is comming in to fast or maybe shes not getting enough I just dont know. Shes also got baby acne and I dont know if that is an alergic reaction or if its just the way it is. I am feeling very lost and confused. As soon as I feed her and lay her down 10 mins later without fail weathr I am holding her or not she wakes up. I am lost no sleep ready to burst into tears I sit up night after night with this baby and I just dont know what to do anymore.

I am trying to stick out the breast thing and now I am just pumping the milk before each feeding and feeding her that way.

What Im curious about is for formula babies what is it like? Do they sleep for longer than 2 hours? Do they get gasey?

Any advice would be great as I am at my wits end right now and feeling pretty upset

[tikitorch]

i doubt what you are eating or feeding her has anything to do with her sleep scheduale. When they are young, they dont know there own bodies and sleep patterns yet and it is all very normal to have interrupted sleep. Pumping and feeding in a bottle is great, nothing wrong with that, formula is fine too (just very expensive) and if you look at it in the long run, you could have been breast fed, and me formula fed and we would not know the difference.

It sound like to me, that you are overtired, do you have anyone helping you out? or anyone taht could help you out so you can get some rest? its very important at this time as 80% of woman get the 'baby blues' and you need time to recouperate.

[notme]

with my dd breastfeeding came easy with my son each day was a struggle . i was in tears , frustrated , exhausted and couldnt understand what i was doing wrong . but it wasnt me , it wasnt my son - i took one day at a time , somedays one hour at a time, when it got really bad i would give him formula and he would sleep a bit longer , i would sleep a bit longer and when we both relaxed again we would nurse. a friend of mine pumped for all 3 of her children .

do what you feel is right for you and your dd . you are not a failure either way , just a mom with a beautiful baby girl .

[hollyhobbie]

hi, it can be tough in the beginning. i would guess that if your babe is having problems that switching to formula probably won't be the magic bullet and may make things worse if there are allergies. special formula is very expensive too. there is a breastfeeding doctor in town. she works out of the clinic at royal oak last i heard. her last name is wickens. she helped me several times. babies do get acne at a certain age no matter what and it has nothing to do with feeding. you could have overactive letdown. this caused me many problems. you need some help and some support. the other really good place to go to is the breastfeeding clinics through the health units. they also helped me on several times. they have a drop in certain days of the week. the health units are listed in the blue pages. if you want to continue breast feeding then i think you need to get the baby back on the breast or your milk supply will decrease and it will be a vicious cycle. i am not pointing any fingers about that just letting you know. you have to decide what is best for you and your baby. i cried many times and was exhausted with both my babies. i did eventually supplment a bit with both babies as i needed a break from the constant eating and no sleep. hope this info helps. my two year old is mucking wiht the mouse so i have to run but if you have more questions please post and i will try and come back to add more info.

[LeahSugar]

I started out trying to do the breast feeding thing (as you know Shea ) but I was dealing with an extremely fussy little boy because he wasn't getting much of anything. Right now I'm pumping and using formula and I honestly wouldn't have it any other way. With my son being bottle fed, his dad gets to spend feeding time with him AND he sleeps for anywhere from 2 hrs to 5 hrs at a time. He's also so content, I'm positive it's because of his feeding schedule.

If you want any more info. give me a call or email me, I highly suggest if you can breast feed AND bottle feed, Ella is most likely at a great age for introducing the bottle and not loosing the breast feeding thing. I've had SO many of my friends tell me that their babies were able to go back and forth. If you can get to that point, I think you'd find yourself a much happier and well rested mom

JMO

L

[rainkat]

my youngest had a severe case of baby acne. as a toddler he has had problems with asthma, allergies and excema. he was absolutely affected by what i ate. if i had any dairy at all he was up all night screaming.

i second the suggestion of consulting with a professional. in the meantime the most common reaction is dairy. you could try cutting it out of your diet for a few days and see if she improves. it takes a while to leave your/her system so you have to give it a little time. many formulas are milk based so if that is the problem switching won't help.

it also could be reflux which can sometimes be helped by keeping baby upright after feeding. that needs to be diagnosed by a dr.

if you need to switch to formula that's what you should do and not feel guilty about it, but what you're describing doesn't really sound like a breastfeeding issue. it sounds more like a digestion issue. does that make sense? hope things get sorted out quickly for you

[Scooby Doo]

I would try cutting dairy from your diet for 2 weeks and see if it makes a difference.

Look into acid reflux, that could be the reason he wakes up after only ten mns of sleep.

Have you checked his mouth for thrush? sometimes just a little bit can cause a lot of problems.

Nurse on the same side for a couple feedings so you completely empty the side before starting on the other.

HTH

[Shae]

Thanks for all your advice I really appreciate it. I am feeling so overwelmed and hopeless and on the verge of tears. I also have an 11 year old who I breastfed and was able to take out of the house for walks everyday without screaming. She has been screaming for 3 hours now. We can get her down for 10 mins then she starts again. I am just lost have no idea what to do with her.

I am going to cut dairy right out of my diet but to be honest Im pretty ready to just throw in the towel. I am really starting to lose it. I am by myself with her all day and I cant even go pee or eat anything.

[kattnipp]

Another idea might be to pump and bottle feed the breast milk.
I wish you the best of luck.
Annette

[monikah]

I think Im either eating wrong foods or my milk is comming in to fast or maybe shes not getting enough I just dont know.

#1 way to answer that question is to be weighing her regularly, that will put your mind at ease. When dd was a baby, we'd make a weekly trek down to the local health unit, they have help-yourself baby weigh scales there. You could even go daily if you want. There are charts to tell you if your baby is gaining enough weight. Are you also aware they have breastfeeding clinics at the health units?

Shes also got baby acne and I dont know if that is an alergic reaction or if its just the way it is.

Baby acne is totally normal. It looks horrible I know, but it happens when the mother's hormones leave the baby's body. We were terribly worried when dd went through this stage, but her skin cleared up just fine. Just have patience, there's nothing you can do for it, its a totally normal thing.

I am feeling very lost and confused. As soon as I feed her and lay her down 10 mins later without fail weathr I am holding her or not she wakes up.

This often happens when baby is nice and warm and you put her down on a cold hard surface. People have all sorts of ways of getting around this. Swaddling is excellent; see 'The Happiest Baby on the Block'. Also putting baby on her side. Some people warm up the bassinet with a water bottle first etc. With dd, my father-in-law had this method where you put the baby down, then put blankets on either side of her to make her feel comfortable, then keep your hand on her tummy and gently vibrate your hand. Many things to try, it doesn't necessarily mean she's not getting enough milk.

I am lost no sleep ready to burst into tears I sit up night after night with this baby and I just dont know what to do anymore.

Again, try swaddling. Or you could try having baby sleep in her carseat; dd slept like that for the first few months and really liked it.

I am trying to stick out the breast thing an
d now I am just pumping the milk before each feeding and feeding her that way.

Hang in there, it will get better! Take it from someone who knows, washing and filling bottles is a heck of a lot more work than breastfeeding, in the long run. You could run into problems if your baby is allergic to formula.

You might want to get help from a lactation consultant. I also found Dr. Jack Newman's book and his website a great help. He suggests 'breast compressions' to help the baby get more milk. There's many videos on his website with solutions to common problems. There's also a device you can use to supplement 'at the breast', its called a S+N System. It stimulates your supply more if baby is at the breast.

Hang in there, it will get better!

[beige]

Hey Shae. I'm so sorry to hear that things are rough with Ella's feeding schedule/reaction.

Taran has major baby acne too and I don't know what to do about it. My MIL suggested that we run our laundry through an extra rinse, since we use Ivory Snow for his laundry and regular detergent for ours. Also, wool bothers his sensitive skin, so we avoid wearing our wool sweaters etc.

As for the feeding--I was complaining recently (and often) of feeling like a flipping feeding bag and how if he wasn't on the boob, he was crying for the boob or fussing from gas. A couple of moms told me not to fret because by about 6-8 weeks they establish more of a feeding pattern and don't feed as often (read: all the time) and that usually by the three month mark the gas pains go away. Although, from what you describe, you need a solution now, not 4 weeks from now.

If you need to scream/vent/sob with someone, give me a call.

[mcmuffins]

I am feeling so overwelmed and hopeless and on the verge of tears.

I am really starting to lose it. I am by myself with her all day and I cant even go pee or eat anything.

i'm so sorry you're in that place. lots of us have been there and it really does pass. just know you're not alone. if you keep feeling this way call your public health nurse. they can be very helpful.

hang in there. it's okay to cry you'll get it sorted out.

[monikah]

Hey Shae, one more thing,

Have you tried a sling? Some babies just need to be carried all the time. DD was like this and couldn't be put down. But she was blissfully happy in the sling. I even managed to pee and cook dinner with her in it.

[Shae]

Hi everyone,

Thank you so much for your support and encouragment I sure need it!

This is supposed to be a happy time for me I just got engaged and here I am having meltdowns about a crying baby.

I did manage to get about 4 hours sleep last night which was helpful. My fiance has some time off in Jan so that will also be a huge help. He is doing everything he can to be supportive but he doesnt have a booby

I am going off dairy today like many of you have suggested. We are going to try that for a few days and see how things go.

Whats driving me crazy is everytime we put this baby down 10 mins later she cries. Why is that? Its like she has to be constantly carried or moved around.

Oh and I do have a carier which I have been using to an extent she cries while in that too there is just no winning!

I am going to try really hard to be possative today and not let this get to me. As you have said I am at the 4 week mark and 6-8 weeks things start to pick up and I can stick it out. Ill just come here and find you girls.

Thanks again for the support I really do appreciate it.

Beige I will be calling Sounds like your living my life!

[STAY@HOME MOM]

with my son he was breast fed he was still hungry after breastfeeding so I always gave him a top bottle of formula, that really helped. he was also very fussy and would only sleep in the swing while it was moving, some babys just like movement. make sure you weight her to make sure she is gaining weight, my other son was also always crying and we thought he was just not eating enough and turned he had bad acid reflux and as he on med to fix the probelm all the crying stopped.

my son also was very gasy so we would have to roll he legs up to his tummy and that really helped pass gas, so she could have tummy trouble have you tried oval drops?