What to do?

Shawna C. · by **Shawna C.** on Sun Jan 15, 2012 7:51 pm

My best friend's really good friend died unexpectedly last night. She was found by her 5 year old child. :cry:

My BFF is devastated. I'd like to give her something along with a card - a basket or something - does anyone have any ideas? I feel so useless. How the hell is a basket supposed to help? I am so full of sorrow for this loss - this was a lovely young woman and she is a single mom who has left behind a child. There are no words and I would like to give my BFF something to let her know that I am there for her and thinking of her.

Olives · by **Olives** on Sun Jan 15, 2012 8:00 pm

I've both given and received those little wooden angels they sell at Hallmark. It has been meaningful for me...and as well for the person I gave one to. I believe there are a few different friend ones.

mc · by mc on Sun Jan 15, 2012 8:26 pm

charlene k does nice little stained glass angels.

Hope1 · by **Hope1** on Sun Jan 15, 2012 9:53 pm

ugh how unbelievably sad! I think more than any thing...to just keep letting her know you are here for her...to listen, talk to go for walks/ coffee..etc..
Good to know she has a friend who cares for her. That must be so hard for her right now.

Shawna C. · by **Shawna C.** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 9:20 am

Thank-you. I am going to put a picture of them in a frame with a poem and drop off some GF cupcakes and a card as well today. I called this morning and was relieved to see that both she and her DH took the day off work. So devastating. The little girl left behind is only 5. :cry:

chanterelle · by **chanterelle** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 11:24 am

I think more important than any card / basket / poem (not that those aren't great, and I'm sure will help) will be your willingness to be a listening ear. Keep reaching out, offering coffee dates, tissues, and a shoulder to cry on.

Such a tough loss. :cry:

funmom · by **funmom** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 11:58 am

Oh my gosh, that is beyond heartbreaking. Holy cow.
Will the little girl have a good stable home, whoever's taking her? I can't even imagine. So sad.
I agree, I don't think presents are needed. Just a shoulder and an ear, and whatever help and support you're able to offer for the little girl left behind too I'm sure would be so appreciated.

monikah · by **monikah** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 1:10 pm

Being there for her and maybe helping with meals. There's nothing you can do to make the pain go away, but you can be there for support.

Abby's Mom · by **Abby's Mom** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 5:59 pm

I so agree, no gifts, just be there, reach out, deliver a nice warm casserole or soup, and just listen.

wonderwoman · by **wonderwoman** on Mon Jan 16, 2012 10:46 pm

OMG Shawna!!! I'm so sorry to hear that :*( Send my love to R!!

Shawna C. · by **Shawna C.** on Tue Jan 17, 2012 7:29 am

wonderwoman wrote:OMG Shawna!!! I'm so sorry to hear that :*( Send my love to R!!

Thanks N

I most certainly will. Sending you and yours MY love.

soexcited · by **soexcited** on Tue Jan 17, 2012 6:18 pm

so horribly sad.... i have a GF whos was close to her as well.... i want to help anyway i can and am lost both for the daughter her grandmother and my friend i am so lost and just can't stop thinking about them :cry:

Shawna C. · by **Shawna C.** on Tue Jan 17, 2012 6:21 pm

soexcited wrote:so horribly sad.... i have a GF whos was close to her as well.... i want to help anyway i can and am lost both for the daughter her grandmother and my friend i am so lost and just can't stop thinking about them

There is a trust fund set up for the child. I will send you the info if you'd like.